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Christmas
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The
holiday season brings out our festive nature at Vinyl Cheese. What
better way to celebrate the holidays with seasonal song favorites
sung in the flavor of the moment.
Our
first two offerings are companion pieces, both released in 1979
as performed by the fabulous Mirror Image on Pickwick Records. You
know, Mirror Image, the disco band filled with studio musicians
who weren't good enough to be in *real* disco bands. So fabulous
were they, the same model decked out in different festive creations...graces
the cover of both albums.
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Disco
Noel
To
your top left we feature the ever popular Disco Noel featuring
tracks such as: Jingle Bells, Jingle Bell Rock, Silver Bells but
our favorite track being Joy To The World with bongo interlude and
dentist drill whistle. Notice how our Love Boat clad lass merrily
trims the Christmas tree with miniature disco ball ornaments while
hustling her booty off? She can do this because *she* read the enclosed
"Disco Dance Step Lesson". See this weeks Other
Cheese for more details. Brush up on your basic latin hustle
skills because without further ado we bring you...Joy
To The World.
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Yuletide
Disco
To
your right is Yuletide Disco featuring our cover model wearing a
tinsel garland bodysuit (our personal favorite). Lucky for us that
same fabulous cover model *already* knew her latin hustle steps
and we get a sexy, super-imposed, boogie-down cover photo. Far and
away, the best track on this album is Rockin' Around the Christmas
Tree with the Hammond Organ pulsating throughout and plenty of lame
saxophone solos to boot. Although the fish may be dead in your Goldfish
Platforms strap those suckers on and pretend you are on a coke binge
at Studio 54! Don't forget the spandex and don't miss Rockin'
Around the Christmas Tree.
We
figure by 1979 all the *good* disco bands had moved on
to bigger and better things, while we were left to wallow in the
mire otherwise known as Mirror Image.
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A
Christmas Record
To
your right, A Christmas Album is the "improved" special
1982 edition containing new tracks by a bunch of artist nobody cared
or cares about. The "best" of these being: The Waitresses, Was (Not
Was), Suicide, Christina and James Whites' song "Christmas with
Satan." This is an Christmas album with lyrics that Bing never sang.
"My
boyfriend said it's really sweet the way I go for Christmas cheer.
I said we can't afford the tree, he said love is free. So we trimmed
the cactus with my earrings that we'd meant to pawn there wasn't
any snow but there was rain, he licked me like a candy cane, and
then one day he said I can't stand in your way, it's wrong. With
what, I asked but he was gone. Things fall apart but they never
leave my heart. *** Christina - Things Fall Apart"
Apparently,
this was a "club-hit"...Things
Fall Apart.
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Christmas
Rap
Nest
down, t' ya' lowa' left be, Christmas Rap, maybe we be
plum jiggy crackers but wez ain't down wit seven out uh nine uh
de rap puh'formers on dis cut. 'S coo', bro! Git out ya' ol' skool
adun didas an' snatch out de kickerchittlin's before listenin' t'
de dope beats by Run-D.M.C., Sweet Tee, King Sun-D Moet, Derek B
an' de Surf M.C.'s. Dis album wuz mastered by de fabulous Howie
Wineberg fo' Profile (Prostash) Records in New York City.
Slap mah fro! Grooves included on dis boo-yaa album be: Ghetto Santa,
Christmas in the City, Chillin' with Santa and That's What I Want
For Christmas.
Dis
be de album t' play supa' loud while cruisin' de boulevard in ya'
low-ridin' hooptie lookin' t' pick down de goats. Widout furda'
ado, Christmas in Hollis. Esamples
uh de lyrics uh dis cut include:
"Mommy
mommy look, here come Santa Claus! And he's black! Yo Ho Ho, Santa
in de house. Pump it up, ya dat's right."
If
you's kin dig it any uh dis, please scribble t' us at VinylCheese
and tell us whut it means.
Special
thanks to the Dialectizer
for the much needed help in writing this section.
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